Well, lots has happened since my last post and I am going to try to get better about posting... about blogging... about journaling here in this public way. I want to share my life more... and in doing so maybe help myself and others.
Since my last post my mother has actually gotten much better. She has moved to a new facility that is more like an assisted living place than a memory care unit. This has been A LOT better for her in that she feels a lot better about herself, she likes her surroundings and she actually has formed some friendships with other people who live there. This reason especially makes me think that in some ways she is even better off there than she is... or was... at "home." I have talked to her for years about how important I thought it was for her to get involved with other people. I am SO glad that she is getting that chance now!!! I just wish that our relationship was the way it was before she got sick. Unfortunately, while she was sick and not aware of what was going on there were some relatives who were able to get their evil hooks into things once again and created situations that have changed everything for good. But even in all that I have lost and wish was different than it is now... I know God has bigger plans for me and that things will work out in the long run. All I need to do is trust in that fact and follow what I am supposed to do... and not do. I pray that my mother and I can be close again someday... but only if it is in a healthy way. I've had WAY TOO MANY relationships that, at their core, have been abusive. I do not need to have anymore of those experiences. There are people out there who are filled with true joy and happiness and love surrounds them. I'm ready to be one of them!
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